So Bz and yet So Lazy

Mind is so disturbed ari nie. My sis in-law selamat melahirkan anak perempuan pagi tadi, kul 4.00am. But, the baby is not all that we always expect - a beautiful baby princess. The doc said the baby might not live long. Maybe juz a month life span. My bro is so heartbroken. I think my bro takes it real bad. He is all depressed and frustrated. My bro went fainted in the elevator. My mother is quite disappointed too. It doesnt run in the family. I am feeling all sad and so sorry for my brother. He is a very good brother actually. We were so close once. During our childhood days, I would drag him to bring me alone in his cycle when playing in the rain. Then, I would ask him to draw for me (the men in my family have artistic skill), help me with the homework, read for me. He was a good son in his young day. Iron his own cloth, make the 'pulling-tea' teh tarik for me and my brother. help my father in the shop, and a very particular in cleanliness. But, somehow he changed after got a job in some car workshop in Klang. But then, he was always good to us. Eating out, go shopping, picnicking, fishing in his motorboat. My brother one thing is, he never mind spending money. He would buy us everything we wanted; Video player, karaoke set, video tape, Hi-fi, and things like that. And I, i love him very much... When I was in boarding school, he always took/send me from and to the school.. so that, i could bring lots of things (and food). He never complained. When I was in the states, I could chat with him for hours over the phone, he never failed to send me 1-kg of FedEx box full of stuff -( kuih, rendang kering, belacan, serbuk this and that, magazines, baju raya..) during hari raya. And I bought him Levi's 501, 505 jean (opps, remind me to get a new pair of jeans this mega sale), dockers slack, Okley's and Ray-ban glasses, POLO Sport perfume (I took the free gift hehehe), Penn Fishing rod, lots of t-shirts esp Hard Rock Cafe those spark plugs (well, being a mechanic).. etc. My brother, Me, my sis-nina, and lil bro-Faizal were really close. But, somehow things changed after he got married. Feeling so sad now that I am crying. Will never forget the days when my father fell so sick... The moment when I heard mother called from the hospital that father had passed away. That the only day that I didnt go to hospital coz I had an interview at Daya bumi for Petronas scholarship. And the second when the obuis-kereta mayat reached my house brought the dead body.. The moment when brother promised to take care of mother, me, nina and faizal...
And whatever happened next, the family ties will never break. He is still my brother... Though hardly spoken to him, deep in heart.. I always love him. Regardless whatever things ppl say about him, he is my good brother... Maybe, this is the turning point for the whole new wonderful my family. Ya Allah, always for You that I pray... May You always blesses us in the family with Your bliss.

Will officially move to Sis' house tomorrow.. Babai my rumah jepun heheh. May the new house is a start for new days...

Let the rain come down
And wash away my tears
Let it fill my soul
And drown my fears
Let it shatter the walls
For a new sun
A new day has come
Where it was dark now there is light
Where there was pain, now there's joy
Where there was weakness, I found my strength