Confession of an andartu?

Writtten on last Sunday
Well, if andartu is the term used for unmarried woman over the age of 27, then yes, I am one. However, if the term referring to dull boring, overreacted, sensitive, loner, picky and hard to please unmarried woman, then I am definitely not fitting under that term.

Anyway, the title is picked after completing one Shoppie Kinsella's series of shopperholic.

I went to team building in Bagan Lalang, Sepang for the last 3 days. I stayed in Seri Malaysia. The course was juz okay-okay, but I met with many wonderful ppl. There were ppl who inspired me so much, ppl whom I admire so much, ppl who were very nice and frenly, ppl who gave useful advice and ppl who were attractive.

That was the first time I went to Bagan Lalang even tho many of my frens went there on regular basis and it is close to my house. Maybe next time, should go to Bagan Lalang instead of Morib. I think Bagan Lalang is the replacement of Morib. If going to Port Dickson is too far, then Bagan Lalang is the next choice. Oh well, actually there is Pulau Carey and Port Klang too. Oh, now I realize that I actually live near the sea. Hopefully, something like Tsunami wont happen here. But, west coast sea especially in this part of Selangor is not a crystal-clear sea. I don't even have the feel to step into water. But, we can camp at Bagan Lalang and my fren said the seafood was heavenly delicious and cheap.

Seri Malaysia Bagan Lalang now is a popular destination for the companies which has economical travelling budget and companies which focus on cutting cost.

On last day of team building, we held one session of complimenting everybody and say only positive things. And guess what I got from that session? I want to put it here so that I can remember it for the rest of my blogging life (Long life, Blogger!). Ppl say I am friendly, funny, nice, sweet, dare to voice out my opinion, dedicated worker, good team member, has lots of frens, cool and moderate, know how to control things (given by my customer, En Hairuddin), co-operative and one that I love the most are, I have a beautiful pair of eyes, I have a sweet smile, I have a beautiful dimple and I am 'cantik'. WOW!!!! How often will u get compliment like this from ppl other than ur bf/gf and family member. Even the trainer was keen on me. I was so flattered and happy.
The truth is, I am juz always trying to be best of myself. I have so many weakness and I am not good.

The sad truth is, this pretty girl has no bf. hehehe.. The cruel truth is the man whom this pretty girl like (but, can't imagine to love tho) juz told her that he never think about her more than friend. Yes, this is bout the guy that I have an interest in. It is ashamed of me to confess my like, and it is so damn embarassing to hear that, and it feel sux, and it is totally has shaken my ego til i feel that where I am gonna put my face after this. Yet, I feel good actually. At least now I can cut off his name from my list (and leave my list empty) and not to put any prospect on him again. Yes, now I don't have to let love stuff lingering in my mind again and I can think about other things like makeup, shopping, mother, nephews, sisters and etc. I already have so much to think about. Now I know also that I don't have to learn to love someone. If I love someone, it will come naturally juz like it did with Najib and pakcik. At first, I thought that he is good guy who a loss if I dont get him. He is the guy to meet my requirement, but he is not the guy to fill my need then. There is no chemistry. I realized this already but maybe I juz tried my luck. Maybe if it is the other way round, it is still okay. I can learn to love him and all that. I know I am a responsible person. Nevertheless, despite this embarassament, I think I feel good and relief.
Maybe it is juz that Allah wants to give me a good guy of my kind of guy, with knowledge and well being like Najib and with maturity and characters like pakcik. I pray hard for this.

Oh ya, how does it feel to be called and treated like andartu? Many ppl ask and while, at once it kinda worry me, now it is juz a pass by. I dont mind. I juz feel that this is the time God gave me to do my favorite stuff like spend time with mother and family, do charity, go to gym, do part time, committed in work, catch up with long lost frens, indulge myself with Clinique and MAC, play with pet named Suzzy, got to know new frens with healing power like Kak Izni, do sunday jog and breakfast with my 'ala Sex and the City' frens, wake up late, and pay my duty to the society through my volunteer work and many more. I can't be more agree that I won't be like this without support from family and frens. I still admit that I am lonely though, I need a soulmate, I need a protector, I need luv. I guess thats okay, life goes on and I want my life goes on in better way.

In addition, there are big things going on and I pray it will succeed.